Showing Up Again: Life, Pauses, and The Year of the Horse.

Written by: Kelsey McVey, LCSW

Dear Fellow Life Jugglers,

If you have been wondering where I went, you’re not alone. I have been wondering the same thing.

I haven’t posted since December, and if I’m being honest, the unexpected parts of life took the wheel. The final stretch of the year has a funny way of speeding up time, even without added stress and the unexpected. Obligations pile on, routines loosen, and before you realize it, your nervous system is running on fumes. For me, what started as a busy week turned into a month passing before I even had a chance to notice.

Don’t get me wrong, the holidays held plenty of joy this year, but they also carried a lot of uncertainty. Expectations, family dynamics, grief, financial stress, transitions, and the ever-present mental load all added up. Looking back, it makes sense that I stepped away. My nervous system was striving for my attention.

Then the new year arrived with its own energy. Hopeful, demanding, symbolic. It asks us to reflect, reset, and re-commit, often before we have had a chance to fully catch our breath. For me, it felt like January didn’t feel like a fresh start so much as a continuation of survival mode with better marketing. Even as I was finding my footing, unexpected news still found a way to arrive, shifting my priorities, shaking up my routines, and pulling my attention in ways I could never plan for.

If you’ve been there too, then you know that when that happens, we start to feel off balance. Fear and anxiety creep in. Thoughts start to spiral and the longer we are away from our routines, our work, or our goals, the harder it can feel to come back. Avoidance starts to make sense because returning feels vulnerable.

This is where my self-judgment entered the room… rather loudly.

For falling behind. For losing momentum. For dropping the ball. For not being who I said I would be or what I would do. That inner voice can weigh heavily on our confidence, convincing us that staying away is safer than trying again. That if we wait just a little longer, we will feel more ready.

But here is what I want to say clearly, both to you and to myself: sometimes the most grounded, self-respecting thing you can do is step away. And sometimes the bravest thing you can do is return gently, without punishment or judgement. To tend to what is happening in real time. To weather the storm instead of pretending it’s not raining.

In my case, that hiatus lasted a little over a month. And it was needed. Work and goals are important, but they are not more important than my nervous system, my values, or my capacity. Pausing didn’t mean I was quitting. Stepping back did not not erase my intentions. It means that I trusted myself enough to listen.

Taking that pause gave me space to reflect, to notice the patterns of my life and the shifts that had been quietly unfolding. In many ways, it felt like a season of letting go. Looking back, this pause mirrored the energy of the Year of the Snake, a year tied to shedding, endings, and deep internal shifts. The snake teaches us that growth often comes through release, through uncomfortable transitions, through letting old skins fall away even when we are not fully ready. For me, it all made sense.

Now, as we step into the Year of the Horse, there is momentum waiting to carry us forward. Energy to move with purpose, clarity to trust our own pace, and the gentle push to step back into the life and work we care about. Not frantic hustle, but steady, intentional motion. The kind that returns after rest, after grief, and after recalibration. The kind that says, I am moving again, and I am bringing everything I have learned with me.

If life pulled you away recently, know that returning does not require perfection, confidence, or a perfectly timed restart. It only requires willingness. This is a season for finding your footing again, for letting go of the self-judgment that kept you stuck, and for moving forward with more wisdom and self-trust than before. Even after a pause, the path ahead is still open, and every small step counts.

This is your invitation to re-emerge with hope, curiosity, and compassion for yourself. The momentum is here. You are allowed to meet it exactly as you are.

This post is me doing exactly that. Showing up again. Slowly, intentionally, warmly. I’m glad you’re here. And if you’re re-emerging in your own time, you’re in good company.

With Love,
Kelsey